10 Things your Bridesmaids want (and need) to know

So your partner has finally popped the question – you’re getting married!

Whether you’re a bridezilla or a bridechilla, any Australian bride needs to choose a band of bridesmaids that will support her through the lead-up to her big day. 

So what’s really expected of the entourage? Who pays for what? What kind of bridal shower do you want? Here are a few things that your bridesmaids will need to know for your wedding.

1.How to prepare your bridesmaids for your big day

Ask anyone who’s married, and they’ll tell you that there’s a massive amount of planning that goes into a wedding. The cake, the schedule, the band…you’ll want everything to be perfect for the most important day of your life. It can be incredibly stressful, and the last thing you want it to do is make a special day seem like the biggest headache of your life. 

Luckily, you’ve got a band of your best girlfriends there to support you through the whole process. Of course, no bride is complete without her amazing bridesmaids, but it’s so important to be upfront with your girls upfront when leading up to the wedding. 

There are a few things that your bridesmaids will want (and need) to know for your big day – let’s discuss the key bridesmaid duties for your wedding!

2.The Schedule

If you’re anything like me, you’ve known who you want your bridesmaids to be for a few years now. But, when it comes to pre-wedding events, being upfront with your bridesmaids about what’s expected of them is vital. With dress fittings, bridal showers, the hen’s party among some of the main events, you need to let your bridal party know what’s expected during the run-up to the big day. Coordinating schedules between you and your girls can be a challenge, which is why communication from day one is so important. 

Now, we know it can be difficult, but one of the most important things to remember is this: while your girls love you, there may be things they can’t make it to. So try to relax and understand that 100% attendance isn’t always possible and that your bridesmaids will do the best they can to make sure that you’re supported.

A good idea is to create a bridesmaid checklist for your girls to follow during the lead-up to the wedding. This gives them a good idea of what you’ll need, when you need it, and what’s in store for key events. 

3.The Costs

Time commitments aside, this is probably the most important item on this list. Weddings are expensive, and not just for the bride and groom – an average Australian wedding in 2021 costs just shy of $36,000! Bridal parties are also expected to cough up a pretty big chunk of cash to stand next to you on your big day. 

So who pays for what?

As a rule of thumb, the bridal party is responsible for paying for their dress, shoes, hair, and makeup. If the wedding is held out of town, there may also be an outlay for travel and accommodation depending on the couple. 

If you’re a bridesmaid who’s a little strapped for cash, you must sit down with your bride early and discuss the situation. While that $800 peach silk cocktail dress might look beautiful, it’s not something that everyone can afford. Instead, calmly explain your concerns, and negotiate a way to remain in the wedding without breaking your budget. 

4.Moral Support

This is probably the biggest bridesmaid duty for your girls leading up to your big day. Planning a wedding can be super stressful, and every bride needs to feel as relaxed and supported as possible before the wedding. 

Even just knowing that your girls are there for you will take a load off your mind and make everything run just a bit more smoothly. 

When you’re stressing over the seating plan, or pulling your hair out after interviewing the ninth band in the row, just having your girls there to support you will make all the difference. 

One great bridal party idea is to hold a classic slumber party - this allows you to check-in with your girls in the lead-up to your big day, and you can relax over a glass of bubbles and your favourite movie. Bliss!

5.The Bridal Shower

Don’t confuse this with the hen’s party – we’ll talk about that soon! The bridal shower is usually held between two months and two weeks before the wedding, and is designed to help the bride set up her new home. 

While the event is traditionally organised by the maid of honour in the form of a morning or afternoon tea, these days, a bridal shower can be any kind of celebration that suits your personality. Invitations to the bridal shower are usually given to all the women in a bride’s life – after all, you might not want Grandma at your hen’s party!

Don’t think that you have to roll with a classic morning tea – from gardening to yoga, your bridesmaids can organise an event that is both fun and caters to the older guests in your life. 

After some unique bridal shower activities? Here’s a list of bridal shower ideas that will suit any bride-to-be!

6.The Bridesmaid Dresses

When it comes to finding bridesmaid dresses, the choices are endless! No longer limited by the classic ‘puffy pink cocktail’ dress, there is something for everyone. Your bridesmaids come in all shapes and sizes, and many will have opinions about colours, styles, and lengths. 

You want your girls to feel comfortable and classy – after all, these photos will last a lifetime. Think of it this way: while one dress may look amazing on your curvaceous maid of honour, it may make your tall, athletic sister-in-law feel out-of-place. 

One popular bridal party trend is the ‘colour scheme’ effect – choose a colour, and let your bridal party pick dresses that suit their style. 

7.The Hens Party!

Finally, the most important part!

Your last celebration as an unmarried woman, the hen’s party, is the biggest day of a wedding calendar (excluding, you know, the actual wedding) – it’s important to get it right. Your maid of honour will most likely take charge of the organisation, but will probably consult with the other bridesmaid when putting on the big event. 

Usually more exclusive than the bridal shower, a hen’s party is any outing that brings the bride and her closest friends together for a day of fun. It’s vital that your girls plan a day that you’ll cherish forever. 

If you’re a more relaxed bride, you can definitely let your bridesmaids run with their imagination – after all, the sky’s the limit! Whether you’re a boho babe, or in the mood for some glam pampering, discuss your ideas with your bridesmaids early, so you’re not caught off-guard. It’s also a good idea to talk about your guest list, so you can make sure that everyone you love receives an invitation!

Do your girls need some inspiration? From a Blue Mountains getaway to picnics in a secret garden, there’s something to suit every bride. We’ve made a list of some of the best ideas for a Sydney hens party to get the ball rolling.

8.Speeches

One of the best parts of any wedding is the speeches, as those closest to the bride and groom talk about the happy couple. Traditionally, your maid of honour would give a quick speech during the reception - however, it’s important to understand that not everyone is comfortable with public speaking. Discuss this bridesmaid duty with your party before the wedding. If your maid of honour or other bridesmaids aren’t happy to speak, don’t force them! 

9.The Emergency Kit

Now, this one is a big one. Any bridesmaid worth her salt will know that on the big day, anything can go wrong and put a dampener on your special day. That’s why it’s so important to have a backup plan for any unexpected incidents.

Ask your girls to put together an emergency kit to keep in the bathroom to help solve any unforeseen dilemmas that may pop up. Bandaids, safety pins, and deodorants are all popular additions to these magical life-savers. So whether and can be the difference between an unforgettable evening and an evening you’d rather forget. 

While these items are great to have on hand, the cost can quickly add up – instead, ask your bridesmaids to each contribute one thing that they think could be helpful for a night full of dancing and celebration. You’ll thank yourself later!

10.After the Ceremony

Between the pre-wedding hair and makeup, photography, and ceremony, a wedding day can be a long one. While it might be tempting to give your bridesmaids some time off, it’s also essential to ensure that you have the support you need during this special event. 

Talk to your bridesmaids about your needs before the big day – you and your groom may need help with things like the guest books, gift tables, or outfit changes before proceeding onto the reception. 

The Final Touches

Finally, the day is over, and it’s time to celebrate! The reception is the part of any wedding where you can finally let your hair down and enjoy your first glass of bubbles with your new husband. Then, it’s time to thank your girls for their support. Finally, dance to your favourite music and give your bridesmaids a break – they’ve earned it!

If it’s in your budget, a gift for your bridal party often goes a long way to show your appreciation. Candles, jewellery, or even a custom photo album are all great ideas for bridesmaid gifts that will make your team feel valued for their part in making your day so special. 

It’s your big day - Let your girls support you!

While wedding planning, your bridesmaids can be your most important support. Being open and honest about what you expect from the first day will go a long way in keeping you – and your girls – happy.